Monday, November 29, 2004

I looked myself up on the dictionary and they marked me as stupid

Liberal celebrities (excuse the redundancy) and many other breads of lovable Democrats adore the following age-old wisecrack:
If you look up Republican in the dictionary, it's just after reptile and just before repugnant.
Whowohhahahznauzha (Knee-slapping)!!

One of the last celebs to dust of this classic in public is Julia Roberts. To play William Safire for a sec, one might explain to Julia that words get their meanings from their own definition, not the surrounding words. But then her eyes would glaze over and smoke would come out of her ears as her brain ground to a halt like a '84 Yugo attempting to traverse a small incline.

But at the risk of stooping to her level, let's dust of the ole Websters and look up Democrat. It is immediately preceded by Demobilize v. - to discharge from military service and followed by Démodé a French word meaning no longer fashionable : out-of-date. That would be actual irony, which is something that Julia can have her publicist explain to her.


Blogger C.M. Burns said...

Did you see what Toothy McHorseface named her just born hellspawn? Phinneaus and Hazel! I would feel sorry for the kids if they were born with souls, instead of human excrement where their souls should be.

Mon Nov 29, 07:56:00 PM 2004  
Blogger Milhouse said...

C'mon, Monty, that's completely uncalled for. This is America, where the constitution explicitly rejects the notion of Corruption of Blood, even in the case of treason, let alone for lesser crimes. These infants were born with pure souls (unless you believe in original sin), and they will remain so at least until they're old enough to become moral agents; to imply that they're born tainted with their mother's sins is, IMNSHO, repugnant.

Tue Nov 30, 01:49:00 AM 2004  
Blogger C.M. Burns said...

Milhouse, don't spoil my fun.

I just happen to think Julia Roberts is a tool of the Devil and her children are Hellspawn. Is that so wrong?

(Actually, I was raised as a Catholic to belive in Original Sin, but I'm not much of a Catholic. I am a pretty decent sinner though.)

Tue Nov 30, 10:13:00 AM 2004  
Blogger Joseph said...

It's hard to come up with a truly original sin. Most sins are imitative.

Wed Dec 01, 12:30:00 AM 2004  

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