Thursday, March 03, 2005

One Man, One Gloat

Steyn is at his best with his latest column. It kicks off at the expense of the Leftists, who still insist war was all wrong, but (begrudgingly) the outcomes are pretty good. Steyn predicts that when the revisionist historians get around to interpreting the events of today, Bush will get the same dismissive treatment that Reagan received after they rewrote the Cold War:

Oh, the Soviet bloc [the Middle East thugocracies] was bound to collapse anyway. Nothing to do with that simpleton Ronnie Raygun [Chimpy Bushitler]. In fact, all Raygun [Chimpy] did was delay the inevitable with his ridiculous arms build-up[illegal unprovoked Halliburton oil-grab], as many of us argued at the time: see my 1984 column 'Yuri Andropov, The Young, Smart, Sexy New Face Of Soviet Communism' [see the April 2004 Spectator column 'Things Were Better Under Saddam: The coalition has destroyed Baathism, says Rod Liddle, and with it all hopes of the emergence of secular democracy' and yes, that really ran in these pages, on 17 April, not 1 April.]
Then after he kicks around the Not-In-Our-Name crowd, he finishes with:

The other day I found myself, for the umpteenth time, driving in Vermont behind a Kerry/Edwards supporter whose vehicle also bore the slogan 'FREE TIBET'. It must be great to be the guy with the printing contract for the 'FREE TIBET' stickers. Not so good to be the guy back in Tibet wondering when the freeing thereof will actually get under way. For a while, my otherwise not terribly political wife got extremely irritated by these stickers, demanding to know at a pancake breakfast at the local church what precisely some harmless hippy-dippy old neighbour of ours meant by the slogan he'd been proudly displaying decade in, decade out: "But what exactly are you doing to free Tibet?" she demanded. "You're not doing anything, are you?" "Give the guy a break," I said back home. "He's advertising his moral virtue, not calling for action. If Rumsfeld were to say, 'Free Tibet? Jiminy, what a swell idea! The Third Infantry Division go in on Thursday', the bumper-sticker crowd would be aghast."

But for those of us on the arrogant unilateralist side of things, that's not how it works. 'FREE AFGHANISTAN'. Done. 'FREE IRAQ'. Done. Given the paintwork I pull off every time I have to change the sticker, it might be easier for the remainder of the Bush presidency just to go around with 'FREE [INSERT YOUR FETID TOTALITARIAN BASKET-CASE HERE]'. Not in your name? Don't worry, it's not.
I think a bumper sticker reading: FREE AFGANISTAN, IRAQ, LEBANON, [INSERT YOUR FETID TOTALITARIAN BASKET-CASE HERE] would be great!!

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